11 Comments

Nicely done - the narrators voice is well done - not too emotional very matter of fact, but real

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Thanks, nibbins. I assumed ghosts don't carry over too much earthly baggage, but they still can hold a grudge. I'm curious, as a reader, did you get the fact that Elizabeth was the one who slit her father's tire (when she was alive), or did I bury that too well?

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I enjoyed this story. Loved the ending where the ghost follows Rachel and she is the one that will eventually turn the father in. Fantastic ending!

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Thanks! I'm glad you liked it.

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I love the whole leaky faucet detail, like Poe's beating heart.

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Once, in a pit of despair, I tried and failed to emulate Poe. Nevermore.

Thanks for commenting.

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Very creative. Enjoyed it.

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Thanks, Vince. I appreciate it.

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Totally loved it. Great structure and energy. Excellent use of the prompts. Gold star.

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Definitely on your lapel. I hear you about the tweaking. It’s all in the tweaking isn’t it?

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This story took about an hour to write and six days to tweak. By the way, I've never won a gold star before. Does one wear it or display it on the mantle? Thanks for reading my story and for the nice words!

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